look no pants
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize