you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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