Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
