Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Girls should come with a carfax report
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
