I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize
