A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
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