i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
