i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
I am spending my child support on dildos
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
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