I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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