Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Randomize
