I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize