I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
