What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Randomize
