end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize