I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
