Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
