i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
farters have to be the big spoon...
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Randomize