He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
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