look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Randomize
