Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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