I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Randomize
