Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
