why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
