We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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