I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Randomize
