Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
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