I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
