It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
