God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
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