so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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