I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
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