If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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