You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I lost the right to judge tonight
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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