Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Randomize
