That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
im on a boat
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