she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Randomize
