called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
