i may or may not be watching the land before time
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
i believe in u and ur pee
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