I'm gonna have a badass scar
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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