If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
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