I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Randomize
