the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
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