yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
