it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize