The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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