i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Randomize