I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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