try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
