Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
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