Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Boobs speak an international language.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
